The wedding was incredible, easily the best day of my life. The honeymoon was a continuation of just that; 2 weeks in heaven to start off a wonderful marriage. I've got lots to talk about both of those matters, but given the significance of today's date I'm going to talk about one particular thing that happened while we were off on our honeymoon.
We were returning to our hotel one night and as we got out of the cab and walked to the entrance of the hotel a young guy (I'd say late 20s) holding a drink came up alongside me and said "hey pal." I looked at him at which point he said "I thought you were Osama's brother." I ignored him and walked away.
Now I was born in this country, I'm a U.S. citizen, I pay my taxes, I donate to charities, I vote, I contribute to the economy, I love my country and I wouldn't rather move to any other place, yet for the first time in my life I felt foreign than night. I felt unwelcome in the country that I had the right to be in, I had just as much right to be there as the guy who made me feel so very wrong for being there yet because of his one line I felt like I truly didn't belong. I didn't think something like that would bother me so much, after all I'm pretty good about taking things as light hearted as possible, but that one incident struck home.
And I began to wonder, had I just been really lucky since 9/11? Were there more people like him who would see me and based on the color of my skin would brand me a terrorist? What made me any less of an American than him? Haven't we been through this before? I thought the civil rights movement brought forth the idea that we can't just single out a group of people based on the color of their skin. For the first time in my life I wanted to leave, I wanted to be at home and I didn't want that home to be here.
It may not seem like much, after all it was just a 5 second interaction with some drunk jerk; drunk people say things all the time, get over it right? Well I am over it, but that isn't to say that I'm afraid of something like that happening again. I've said it before, that it all boils down to education and understanding of people and cultures other than our own.
Muslims don't hate Americans, that's just not how things work. My mom is a muslim and she'd never hurt a fly, she cried at 9/11, she donated to the relief fund, she condemned those who did it - just like everyone else. She isn't a fanatic, I'd say she follows the Qua-ran like many people follow the Bible, she doesn't interpret it strictly but she takes it to be a set of morals that she attempts to uphold in her daily life. And to those who don't believe it, must muslims are just like that. They don't walk around with AK-47s plotting ways to attack the West, they lead normal lives and have normal families just like everyone else. I've been to Iran around 5 times now, the only current example of a true Islamic state - did I see people running through the streets plotting to kill Americans? No, I saw normal people doing normal things. Sure their customs are different, but none of those customs include hating Americans. Yet I read through some of the discussions that happen online, even in our own forums, and I'm disgusted. I read statements of people who are clearly ignorant of what they are talking about, attacking people and cultures they don't understand. What if we were all judged by the acts of the D.C. sniper, McVeigh or Dahlmer? Everyone would think that any American was a crazed mass murdering psycho.
As I write this, I'm worried that my point won't get across, that everything I've said here will be dismissed at the hatred will continue. I was just as angry as anyone when the towers fell, I wanted to see someone pay, I wanted revenge - but we must all understand that the revenge isn't against every middle easterner you see. A group of people hated our government, so they took that anger and hatred not out on the government, but on over 3000 innocent people. What sense does it make to attack that group of people by targeting those that honestly have nothing to do with it, some of which are just as American as anyone else in this country.
Today we should all remember the tragedy of 9/11, but we must also remember not to let one tragedy lead us to another one. American doesn't mean white; keep in mind how this country was founded, the melting pot has evolved to include a few new shades but the fact remains the same that we are all Americans. I may not look like everyone else, but I feel the same attachment to this country - please don't make me feel unwelcome.
Take care.
We were returning to our hotel one night and as we got out of the cab and walked to the entrance of the hotel a young guy (I'd say late 20s) holding a drink came up alongside me and said "hey pal." I looked at him at which point he said "I thought you were Osama's brother." I ignored him and walked away.
Now I was born in this country, I'm a U.S. citizen, I pay my taxes, I donate to charities, I vote, I contribute to the economy, I love my country and I wouldn't rather move to any other place, yet for the first time in my life I felt foreign than night. I felt unwelcome in the country that I had the right to be in, I had just as much right to be there as the guy who made me feel so very wrong for being there yet because of his one line I felt like I truly didn't belong. I didn't think something like that would bother me so much, after all I'm pretty good about taking things as light hearted as possible, but that one incident struck home.
And I began to wonder, had I just been really lucky since 9/11? Were there more people like him who would see me and based on the color of my skin would brand me a terrorist? What made me any less of an American than him? Haven't we been through this before? I thought the civil rights movement brought forth the idea that we can't just single out a group of people based on the color of their skin. For the first time in my life I wanted to leave, I wanted to be at home and I didn't want that home to be here.
It may not seem like much, after all it was just a 5 second interaction with some drunk jerk; drunk people say things all the time, get over it right? Well I am over it, but that isn't to say that I'm afraid of something like that happening again. I've said it before, that it all boils down to education and understanding of people and cultures other than our own.
Muslims don't hate Americans, that's just not how things work. My mom is a muslim and she'd never hurt a fly, she cried at 9/11, she donated to the relief fund, she condemned those who did it - just like everyone else. She isn't a fanatic, I'd say she follows the Qua-ran like many people follow the Bible, she doesn't interpret it strictly but she takes it to be a set of morals that she attempts to uphold in her daily life. And to those who don't believe it, must muslims are just like that. They don't walk around with AK-47s plotting ways to attack the West, they lead normal lives and have normal families just like everyone else. I've been to Iran around 5 times now, the only current example of a true Islamic state - did I see people running through the streets plotting to kill Americans? No, I saw normal people doing normal things. Sure their customs are different, but none of those customs include hating Americans. Yet I read through some of the discussions that happen online, even in our own forums, and I'm disgusted. I read statements of people who are clearly ignorant of what they are talking about, attacking people and cultures they don't understand. What if we were all judged by the acts of the D.C. sniper, McVeigh or Dahlmer? Everyone would think that any American was a crazed mass murdering psycho.
As I write this, I'm worried that my point won't get across, that everything I've said here will be dismissed at the hatred will continue. I was just as angry as anyone when the towers fell, I wanted to see someone pay, I wanted revenge - but we must all understand that the revenge isn't against every middle easterner you see. A group of people hated our government, so they took that anger and hatred not out on the government, but on over 3000 innocent people. What sense does it make to attack that group of people by targeting those that honestly have nothing to do with it, some of which are just as American as anyone else in this country.
Today we should all remember the tragedy of 9/11, but we must also remember not to let one tragedy lead us to another one. American doesn't mean white; keep in mind how this country was founded, the melting pot has evolved to include a few new shades but the fact remains the same that we are all Americans. I may not look like everyone else, but I feel the same attachment to this country - please don't make me feel unwelcome.
Take care.
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Anonymous - Wednesday, September 15, 2004 - link
I am in the military and can honestly say that I hold no hatred towards anyone's culture or people. I'm sorry that someone would say such a thing to yourself Anand. It's people such as yourself that are a valuble part of the community. Best advice I can give is let this man's words roll off you as water to a ducks feather's.Anonymous - Wednesday, September 15, 2004 - link
Hellophoptic - Wednesday, September 15, 2004 - link
it´s quite simple: You cannot expect that all people are as intelligent as in this forum. There´s no difference between europe and usa if racism comes into play.I´m european, if it matters
mehdi - Wednesday, September 15, 2004 - link
Hi anandIm an iranian and i have been a fan of your site for a long time.
First congratulations on your wedding and i wish you love , happiness and health .I think your people should realize that the way a country acts is based on the governments not ordinary people . And most of us in iran arent against anyone and we are completley against any kind or terrorism. And what we see in iran or anywhere else isnt a sample of a complete islamic country not even near it . Here seems the word "ISLAM" has turned into a power source in hands of my Gov. and a Target to blame for many problems in your country`s Gov. .
We all are humans and should like each other for as much as love we have in our hearts .
Vancello - Wednesday, September 15, 2004 - link
#31 Your's is, in my opinion, the most completely accurate assesment of this thread. One has only to observe the unbelievably bad grammar used in most of these postings to validate a well deserved suspicion of the intelligence behind them. Peace Annand!pptl - Tuesday, September 14, 2004 - link
Replying to 70 - Posted by gumbico,I totally agree with post #70. I live in Bush Land and let me tell you, I Fourth generation Chinese-American are still considered foriegners. After work, most have to find other Asian friends to hang out because their caucasien counterparts are doing "American stuff". Sure they may offer to join them, but do you feel comfortable enough to "be yourself." I'm classified as an Asian, but it all a facade, beciuse in the end there is just ME. Hang tight, because there's always CANADA, the other 1st world country REALLY run by immigrants.
pptl
Steve G - Tuesday, September 14, 2004 - link
-You don't have to shout your condolences from the mountain top to be sympathetic.-You don't have to put an American flag you your Ford truck to be patriotic.
-You don't have to want to live in this country to be a decent person.
-You don't have to be apathetic towards the tens of thousands of innocents who died in the war on terror to be sorry for the thousands (and their families) who died on 911.
-Even white Christians are heretics to someone.
-You can be white and USA-born and believe these things without shame. I know I do.
There's a lot of $#$% flying around. It's all misunderstandings that stems from the assumption that one knows exactly what the other person is talking about, even though one doesn't have a clue. Please...
slay9 - Tuesday, September 14, 2004 - link
Anand,I completely know where you're coming from. I was born in Afghanistan, but I was raised in the United States. This is the only home I know. After 9/11, I joined the Navy to become a SEAL (something to do with revenge as you mentioned.) To this day I still get "looks" probably similar to what you got. Practically everytime I have to fly anywhere, I get a lot of grief from airport security. Keep your chin up my friend, you're not the only one...
Anonymous - Tuesday, September 14, 2004 - link
Bodily identification by any name whether it be national or religious is the real ignorance. As long as we base our identity entirely on our physical forms, this kind of prejudice is unavoidable. Consciousness is the common denominator of all life, which should be properly respected, as we would expect others of ourselves. If we could only learn that our real identity is beyond the temporary identities we take up for 100 years or so. That consciousness, the symptom of the soul is the common denomonator. How trivial are our likes and dislikes, ups and downs, bruised or boosted egos, of a tiny speck in the midst of a billion years. Whether we die now or in 40 years, in the end it's all pretty inconsequential, and ultimately inevitable.MySympathies - Tuesday, September 14, 2004 - link
hey, anand. i'm deeply angered and saddened by what happened to you. my friend's sister was assaulted the day after 911 because she is lebanese, so i definitely am no stranger to this kind of thingbut as much as i hate to diminish what heppened to you, many people have and continue to endure similar things. african americans (especially males) such as myself constantly endure prejudice-enduced slights every day. women sometimes clutch their purses when i walk by, i occasionally get the "you're a shoplifter" look whenever i walk into a store, and this all goes on in a pretty liberal and prominent academic community. sadly, it's the kind of thing that is associated with being in a minority group. baptism by fire, as it were.
don't let it make you bitter. you'll be alright.